marți, 29 iulie 2014


We are living  pretty weird times. We allegedly are crossing the  feminism of the third wave, but apparently it's a wave that does nothing, but washing  the other ones. Everything seems to fall apart, to be deconstructed until being demolished or distorted, in the best case. On the other hand some leftists and the cultural relativism dilute any clear message. Sometimes things really are black and white, no shades of gray. Sometimes you have to make precise spectral analyses. So in feminism  sometimes things are clear. And painful. Patriarchy exists, destroy lives, minds, in every moment, even now. Women are taught to be slaves,to adapt as slaves, with more or less "rights". Any approach which doesn't go to the root of things, the existence of patriarchy, it's just a cosmetic measure. It's like you plug a hole in a dam, but you still remain in an inundated / flooded  area 

It looks absolutely amazing, but there is feminism that accepts prostitution, calling prostitutes "sex workers". Well yes, and slaves are all kinds. Can illegal immigrant workers be called "workers in agriculture, construction" etc.. They work, but why do it? Like prostitutes, even if they are not forced by pimps, as well as women who are not kidnapped, but married to abusive men. They have sex with those men (without any pleasure ) and remain with them, they even have children fathered by these men, may have multiple abortions, but only because they have no choice. It's about survival forced by poverty. But survival in the  Nazi or communist camps is still survival. And if there, people make survival strategies. But one can't say living like that it's a way of life. In dictatorships have to adapt. But one can't tell that dictatorship is a legitimate lifestyle. I'm saying it as a person who saw a  communist dictatorship. Prostitution, and here I'd  exclude luxury prostitution, although I am not sure about that, is not a lifestyle, it's a horrible way of survival. Many heterosexual relationships motivated by  survival are  prostitution too. If you say that these relationships  are worthy alternative lifestyles, motivated by real choices, where the reward is more than survival, you commit  a crime against the people who live like that
Cultural relativism and blaming Eurocentrism (which I agree with to some extent) have absolutely horrible consequences such as oxymorons like Islamic or Christian feminism. Well then we can talk about feminist rape, why not? If there is  feminist burqa, why not going farther?
It seems politically incorrect to say that the situation of women in Islam is unacceptable because it would hurt the feelings of Muslim women. I mean saying that rape is horrible hurts the  feelings of  raped women? Or what? I'm all for tolerance, but not until there is nothing left to claim
As for Eurocentrism, it exists, is more prevalent than we think, it has deeper roots. Western science is not the only approach to knowledge and it developed in certain special conditions. But if a  secular European white woman who cautions that women in Islam are living in an unacceptable way, that poor women often experience a form of prostitution and abuse, prostitution is a crime, she does not it because of Eurocentrism, contempt for other cultures or classism. Not all the time, anyway!  
When we ask for something, we refer to something / someone who has more than us. When black slaves were talking about freedom, they use the whites's status as a reference system the black liberation movement in the US uses the the social, economic, political status of whites as a reference system. What would have happened if Martin Luther King have accepted the lifestyle of blacks, meaning unemployment, lack of education, poverty and violence as a legitimate lifestyle, which is not allowed to talk about in order to avoid  offending  the feelings of those who live like that?
Western culture is not something extraordinary and whites are not extraordinary peopleEuropeans even less. But we cannot deny that the westerners have the highest social, economic status,  they enjoy the most freedom and they have the best medicine. Things can change, but now this is case. Moreover, other cultures are more advanced in other respects. But when we ask for something,we demand something, when it comes to individual freedom, civil rights, health, we refer to the West. Sure, it's good to get more, but even so
Saying that a white  educated middle class woman does something disgusting when she tells Muslim women that their way of life is oppressive, the same the impoverished women trapped in abusive heterosexual relationships or prostitutes, she doesn't disregard any of them. She does it just because she doesn't  consider that she, as a white and educated western women deserves more than other women. Just for that.
Some leftists, accepting the misery of poor people's lives in oppressive cultures, only perpetuate the conditions those people are living in, maintaining their privileges for themselves. What should do westerners, especially if they are doctors when encounter people living in traditional societies?  Should they leave incantations and traditional medical practices like sex with virgins as a medicine against AIDS intact and not give them modern medicines because these medicines may offend them?  
I am an educated white middle class woman who does not consider herself special and wants to get everything through individual merits, not because she's white, educated, or middle class. Any person with similar merits, wherever she/he is, deserves similar social and economic status. I still want a high SPF cream for myself. It's the only thing I feel entitled to have as a white person.   

Traim niste timpuri tare ciudate. Traversam, chipurile, feminismul celui de-al treilea val, dar se pare ca e un val care nu face altceva decat sa le spele pe celelalte. Totul pare a se dezintegra, a se deconstrui pana la daramare sau denaturare, in cel mai bun caz. Pe de alta parte stanga si relativismul cultural dilueaza orice mesaj clar. Uneori lucrurile chiar sunt albe sau negre, nu sunt nuante de gri. Uneori trebuie sa facem analize spectrale precise. Asa si in feminism, uneori lucrurile sunt clare. Si dureroase. Patriarhatul exista, distruge vieti, minti, in fiecare clipa, chiar si acum. Femeile sunt educate sa fie sclave, se adapteaza ca sclave, cu mai mult sau mai putine "drepturi". Orice demers care nu merge pana la radacina lucrurilor, existenta patriarhatului, e doar o masura cosmetica. E ca si cum ai astupa o spartura intr-un dig, dar ai ramane tot intr-un teritoriu inundat/inundabil.
Pare absolut incredibil, dar exista feminism care accepta prostitutia, numindu-le pe prostituate "lucratoare sexuale". Pai da, si sclavii sunt de toate felurile. Poti numi muncitorii clandestini imigranti "muncitori in agricultura, constructii" etc. Sunt lucratori, dar de ce o fac? La fel ca si prostituatele, la fel ca si femeile care, chiar daca nu sunt fortate de proxeneti, se prostitueaza, la fel ca si femeile care chiar daca nu sunt rapite, se casatoresc cu barbati abuzivi, fac sex cu ei (fara nicio placere) si raman cu ei, le fac chiar copii, daca nu multiple avorturi, pentru ca nu au de ales. E vorba de supravietuire, de saracie. Dar supravietuirea in lagar e tot supravietuire. Si acolo ne facem strategii de supravietuire. Dar nu spuneam ca e un mod de viata. In dictaturi ajungi sa te adaptezi. Dar nu spui ca in dictatura e un mod de viata legitim. Spun ca o persoana care a vazut dictatura comunista. Prostitutia, si aici as exclude cumva prostitutia de lux, desi nu sunt sigura de asta, nu e un mod de viata, e un mod oribil de supravietuire. La fel si relatiile heterosexuale de necesitate/supravietuire care sunt tot prostitutie. A spune ca sunt alternative la modul de viata demn, liber, cu alegeri reale, in care recompensa sa fie mai mult decat supravietuirea, e o crima la adresa oamenilor care traiesc asa. 
Relativismul cultural si blamarea eurocentrismului (cu care sunt mai mult decat de acord pana la un punct) au consecinte absolut oribile, cum ar fi oxymoroni ca feminism islamic sau crestin. Pai atunci putem vorbi si de viol feminist, de ce nu? Daca exista burqa feminista, de ce nu ar exista si asa ceva?
Pare incorect politic sa spui ca situatia femeilor in islam e inacceptabila pentru ca ar rani sentimentele femeilor islamice. Adica sa spui ca violul e oribil raneste sentimentele femeilor violate? Sau cum? Sunt pentru toleranta, dar nu pana a nu mai ramane nimic din revendicari.
Cat despre eurocentrism, acesta exista, e mai raspandit decat credem noi, are radacini mai adanci. Stiinta occidentala nu e singurul demers de cunoastere, s-a dezvoltat in anumite conditii. Dar a spune ca o femeie alba europeana seculara care atrage atentia ca femeile in islam traiesc intr-un mod inacceptabil, ca femeile sarace traiesc adesea intr-o forma de prostitutie si abuz, ca prostitutia e o crima, nu inseamna nici eurocentrism, nici dispret fata de alte culturi, nici clasism.
Atunci cand cerem ceva, ne raportam la ceva/cineva care are mai mult. Sclavii negri s-au raportat la ce aveau albii, la fel, miscarea de eliberare a negrilor americani s-a raportat la statusul social, economic, politic al albilor. Ce s-ar fi intamplat daca Martin Luther King ar fi acceptat modul de viata al negrilor, cu somaj, lipsa de educatie, saracie si violenta ca fiind un mod de viata legitim, despre care nu e voie sa vorbesti ca jignesti sentimentele celor care traiesc asa?
Cultura occidentala nu e ceva extraordinar, albii nu sunt extraordinari ca oameni, Europenii nici atat. Dar nu putem nega ca Occidenatalii au cel mai inalt status economic, social, cea mai multa libertate, cea mai buna medicina. Lucrurile se pot schimba, dar asa e acum. Mai mult, alte culturi sunt mai avansate din alte puncte de vedere. Dar atunci cand cerem ceva, cand revendicam ceva, cand e vorba de libertate individuala, drepturi civile, sanatate, ne raportam la Occident. Sigur, e bine sa obtinem mai mult, dar macar atat.
A spune ca o femeie alba educata, din clasa mijlocie face ceva scarbos atunci cand le atrage femeilor musulmane ca modul lor de viata e opresiv, femeilor sarace prinse in relatii heterosexuale abuzive sau prostituatelor, nu o face nici din dispret fata de ele, ci tocmai pentru ca nu considera ca fiind alba si educata merita sa aiba mai mult decat alte femei. Doar pentru asta.
Unii oameni de stanga, acceptand mizeria din vietile oamenilor saraci, din culturi opresive, nu fac altceva decat le perpetueaza starea mentinandu-si ei insisi privilegiile. Ce ar trebui sa faca albii, mai ales daca sunt medici? Sa lase incantantiile si practicile traditionale ucigatoare, sau sexul cu virginele contra SIDA si sa nu le dea oamenilor din culturi traditionale medicamente moderne ca sa nu-i jigneasca?
Sunt o alba educata din clasa mijlocie care nu se considera speciala si vrea sa obtina totul prin merite individuale, nu pentru ca e alba, educata, din clasa mijlocie. Orice persoana cu merite similare, de oriunde ar fi, sa aiba status economic si social similar. Tin doar la crema cu factor de protectie inalt. E singurul lucru la care ma simt indreptatita sa-l am ca alba.

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